PETER SAGAL, HOST:
We want to remind everyone that they can join us most weeks back at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago, Illinois and on our upcoming show in Newark, New Jersey on December 4. For tickets and more information, go wbez.org or you can find a link at our website which as always is waitwait.npr.org.
Right now panel, I turn to you with some questions about this week's news. Bobcat, that doctors and nurses caring for the nation's only Ebola patient in a hospital in New York now have to deal with a new threat. The patient has somehow acquired what?
BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: An attorney.
SAGAL: No.
(LAUGHTER)
GOLDTHWAIT: This is a medical problem?
SAGAL: Well, it's more of an environmental problem. Let me give you a hint.
GOLDTHWAIT: An allergy?
SAGAL: No. The only thing more deadly than the Ebola virus is a badly played rendition of "Foggy Mountain Breakdown."
GOLDTHWAIT: Oh, a banjo?
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: He has acquired somehow a banjo.
(APPLAUSE)
TOM BODETT: That's like one of those desert island jokes. What would you rather be stranded with on a desert island - Ebola or a banjo?
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: So let me tell you...
GOLDTHWAIT: I think - can you imagine being in that hospital? It's like the guy next to him, he's got Ebola. Oh no, it's worse - he's got a banjo.
(LAUGHTER)
BODETT: Yeah, you might be smart like a - or dumb like a fox and nothing will get you out of quarantine quicker than whipping out the banjo. You're doing fine, you can go.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Reports from Bellevue Hospital in New York say the doctor is whiling away the time doing yoga and playing the banjo, which has the hospice staff secretly rooting for the virus.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: All right, all right. Look Ebola, all right, don't kill him, but a little paralysis.
(LAUGHTER)
GOLDTHWAIT: You guys better come up with a cure because I got a buddy who's giving me bagpipes.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It is true though. I mean, it's cheaper than like a quarantine. The CDC is now handing out banjos to people that might have Ebola to isolate them.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: And now the problem is in the hospital, other people think they have Ebola because their ears are bleeding.
(SOUNDBITE OF BANJO)
SAGAL: Coming up - go, fight, win, lie. It's our sporty Bluff The Listener Game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.